Protect Your Mental
She told me the reality of it allThat we may not be happy ALL of the time In fact It's normal to fluctuate She told me it's ok to be down, but to realize when to get up She made my feelings have merit She understood Finally
"She" is my therapist I started seeing a therapist after coming to terms with my depression In and after college, I started shutting myself out from making any possible human connection that didn't involve going to work or school I was functional Only not "normally" or like I used to be I had a good one or two actual friends Stopped going out unless it involved alcohol... Lots and lots of alcohol I accepted shitty relationships for the sake of being wanted Barely got out of bed on weekends Quit my track team ....twice & just sulked in what I believed to be a normal wave of sadness
That "wave" lasted for almost two years until I realized it was unhealthy I was dull lost empty depressed
I needed an out but I didn't know how People began to think I was stuck up You know because I was quiet.. but the truth is.. I forgot how to be myself so I just felt it was easier to be silent and go unnoticed
No one would miss me anyway, right?
Once I came to terms with speaking to someone It all made sense I began to feel alive again Important I felt like I wanted ME I was pleasantly surprised I feel that there's such a stigma on therapy Society places the "crazy label" on those who seek help through counseling
To anybody that needs to hear this.. I'm telling you It's such a liberating experience Such an eye opener into yourself You become in touch Aware Accepting "okay" Just to name a few
My main mistake was comparing my sadness I felt I had no right to claim depression I'd seen worse I had also gone through worse than someone who has it that much easier Depression has many different forms Protect what's yours
As soon as I began to open up to my loved ones about this I got such an outpour of love and support. To my surprise so many of them had gone through the same thing. It's such a relief to see that you are not alone in a feeling that can be so lonely and that's what prompted me to share this
Protect your mental Especially as a minority in today's world It's SO important to grip and come to terms with your reality before accepting someone else's
Realization is step one to happiness Step two is up to you and the rest is unwritten
This was a tough post. It lacks depth in comparison to what really transpired.. but depression is even tougher.
I'm happy now, if you wondered. It's a stairwell that I'm continuously climbing... It's possible to get it all back..
I just... You just have to want it
Thanks to my best friend & her beautiful son for the photographic representation of what strength and hope truly looks like to me.